"As for Murray, he and Plaza shared a “deep connection,” and even tore
down the divider between their adjoining trailers. “Whenever I went to
my trailer, he would be sitting there making a gin and tonic and looking
at me. I was, like, ‘Honey, I’m home.’” Her boyfriend, screenwriter
Jeff Baena, was aware and approved of the relationship. “We didn’t
consummate it or anything,” she says, “at least not physically.”
Don't Roll Your Eyes At Aubrey Plaza, NY Mag
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Almost Sensical Revenge Outros I Made Up.
1.)"Guilt. Like the waves breaking against the rocks, guilt will beat you, over and over again, until you succumb and slink down into the blackness at the bottom. But what happens when there's a giant shark down there?"
2.)"Betrayal. They say betrayal is the last emotion the sun feels as the encroaching night pushes it off the edge of the horizon. But those who are betrayed don't stay out of the picture for long. Soon, very soon, they are ready to burn anew. And the heat they give off? Well, it can be chilling. It's parka season in the Hamptons."
3.) "Longing. It's in the way the fish swim to the hook, even though a dark fate awaits them there. Or the way a boat tries to take itself further and further out to sea. A wise man once said that longing is the opposite of having. So what is longing for the people who have everything?"
Friday, April 27, 2012
Friday, June 10, 2011
From the AV Club's 4 Part Interview with Dan Harmon:
For the large part of this episode, I was in this room alone with Megan [Ganz]. I remember that experience very well because I was at my emotional wits’ end. I had been told numerous times before that, as early as episode seven, that I was at my wits’ end. People kept telling me to stop. They would say, “You’re at the end of your rope.” And I’d say, “Why are you saying that? That seems like a weird thing to wish on someone. I’m really happy. I love my show.” And they’d say, “No, no, you are exhausted, you need to cool out.” And I’d go home from those meetings thinking, “I think that they just wish that I wasn’t me.”
And it’s funny, because on that episode, I found out what the actual end of the rope feels like, because there is definitely no point in both seasons where I’ve been so terrified of my own failure. I’ve never been able to taste it like that. It was a combination of being that far behind schedule—there was no breaking the story, having a draft, table-reading, getting notes—and the episode obviously wouldn’t have existed if that had had to happen, because that process was designed to stop weird things from happening. And for good reason. There was too much risk and not enough reward. There is money being made and a business being transacted on every other network, and here we are on this little island of “Who gives a fuck?” But at some point, it doesn’t even matter. “Stop overthinking it; stop being weird. What’s the worst thing that could happen to your numbers if you go home and sleep a little bit?”
Sometimes you focus so much on getting away with stuff because you think, “Oh, if I could just get away with it, then everything will be great.” But then you get away with something accidentally, and you realize, “Wait, I get away with everything. I’m at the tippy-top of a $2 million investment into a half-hour of television about what? What is even going on in this story?” And it surprises people to hear me describe it that way, because mostly it was just a cute episode. It wasn’t perceived by anyone—and I refuse to read any reviews of this episode—but it seemed from the Twitter feed that really all of my anxiety was… the disparity was really odd.
The humility in this, especially in this part: Sometimes you focus so much on getting away with stuff because you think, “Oh, if I could just get away with it, then everything will be great.” But then you get away with something accidentally, and you realize, “Wait, I get away with everything. I’m at the tippy-top of a $2 million investment into a half-hour of television about what? makes me want to print it out and send it to Matt Weiner.
For the large part of this episode, I was in this room alone with Megan [Ganz]. I remember that experience very well because I was at my emotional wits’ end. I had been told numerous times before that, as early as episode seven, that I was at my wits’ end. People kept telling me to stop. They would say, “You’re at the end of your rope.” And I’d say, “Why are you saying that? That seems like a weird thing to wish on someone. I’m really happy. I love my show.” And they’d say, “No, no, you are exhausted, you need to cool out.” And I’d go home from those meetings thinking, “I think that they just wish that I wasn’t me.”
And it’s funny, because on that episode, I found out what the actual end of the rope feels like, because there is definitely no point in both seasons where I’ve been so terrified of my own failure. I’ve never been able to taste it like that. It was a combination of being that far behind schedule—there was no breaking the story, having a draft, table-reading, getting notes—and the episode obviously wouldn’t have existed if that had had to happen, because that process was designed to stop weird things from happening. And for good reason. There was too much risk and not enough reward. There is money being made and a business being transacted on every other network, and here we are on this little island of “Who gives a fuck?” But at some point, it doesn’t even matter. “Stop overthinking it; stop being weird. What’s the worst thing that could happen to your numbers if you go home and sleep a little bit?”
Sometimes you focus so much on getting away with stuff because you think, “Oh, if I could just get away with it, then everything will be great.” But then you get away with something accidentally, and you realize, “Wait, I get away with everything. I’m at the tippy-top of a $2 million investment into a half-hour of television about what? What is even going on in this story?” And it surprises people to hear me describe it that way, because mostly it was just a cute episode. It wasn’t perceived by anyone—and I refuse to read any reviews of this episode—but it seemed from the Twitter feed that really all of my anxiety was… the disparity was really odd.
The humility in this, especially in this part: Sometimes you focus so much on getting away with stuff because you think, “Oh, if I could just get away with it, then everything will be great.” But then you get away with something accidentally, and you realize, “Wait, I get away with everything. I’m at the tippy-top of a $2 million investment into a half-hour of television about what? makes me want to print it out and send it to Matt Weiner.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
The Best One Line Emails My Dad Has Sent Me
“This Saturday your LSAT score expires.”
“The bedroom tv broke now i can sleep. love dad”
“Mail me your tax returns today love dad to all ”
“Don’t get too excited how much are they offering u? love dad”
“Nothing is going on. Please call tonight. Love dad”
“The bedroom tv broke now i can sleep. love dad”
“Mail me your tax returns today love dad to all ”
“Don’t get too excited how much are they offering u? love dad”
“Nothing is going on. Please call tonight. Love dad”
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Headlines for Unusable Getty Images Round 2
"Playgrounds Help Caregivers Broach Nursing Home Options With Aging Parents"
"Study Suggests Gluten Intolerance Higher In Winnebago Drivers."
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
My problem with this billboard
She just doesn't look that in need. Maybe hack off one of the pigtails and leave the ends really razored and matted like homeless dog fur? I dunno. What are some problems you guys have with billboards?
Monday, January 31, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
The Best Answers To The Question "What wine goes with bolognese?" From Internet Commenters.
I'm guessing Red Wine,that's what they serve in the resturants in Calgary.
as long as its wet it dont matter lol
Anything you enjoy, or maybe your trying to impress someone. In that case ask them what their favorite is. Its that simple. everyone has individual tastes. Live,experiment a little.
Red or white
my favorite wine is dandelion wine. my cousin rob makes it at his house.
as long as its wet it dont matter lol
Anything you enjoy, or maybe your trying to impress someone. In that case ask them what their favorite is. Its that simple. everyone has individual tastes. Live,experiment a little.
Red or white
my favorite wine is dandelion wine. my cousin rob makes it at his house.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
From the last essay in the new Geoff Dyer collection, on his marriage.
'Aside from its amazing cheapness, the only unusual thing about our wedding was an agreement we made—a private addendum to the regular vows—whereby I would be free to write anything I wanted about us and our relationship, irrespective of whether it was true."
via GLK.
via GLK.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Deborah Solomon is the worst.
This:
A friend of mine says that nightlife represents the greatest waste of human energy in the history of mankind.
1.) "A friend of mine says" is the journalistic equivalent of "my girlfriend in Canada."
2.) Why you gotta fight with every one, Solly? You're like one of those straight-out-of-college-with-something-to-prove boys that think a good conversation involves antagonizing someone about retarded things.
A friend of mine says that nightlife represents the greatest waste of human energy in the history of mankind.
1.) "A friend of mine says" is the journalistic equivalent of "my girlfriend in Canada."
2.) Why you gotta fight with every one, Solly? You're like one of those straight-out-of-college-with-something-to-prove boys that think a good conversation involves antagonizing someone about retarded things.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Headlines for Unusable Getty Images
"Study Finds That Bearded Men Require Two More Hours of Cake Sleep Than Unbearded Men."
"Many Actors Do Light Stock Photo Work On Their Way To Comedy Careers."
Monday, January 17, 2011
Just think
At least you’re not Jennifer Aniston. Think about much it would suck to be Jennifer Aniston. Once you’re Jennifer Aniston you’re Jennifer Aniston forever, as the cardinal rule of Being Jennifer Aniston goes.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Lines From The X-Files I Used On The Ticket Agent To Try To Get On A Plane To New York During Snowpocalypse
“I’m a doctor. I SAVE LIVES.”
“You've never seen me panic. When I panic, I make this face.”
“After all you've seen you can just walk away?“
“Fine, here’s the truth. I'm the key figure in an ongoing government charade, the plot to conceal the truth about the existence of extraterrestrials. It's a global conspiracy, actually, with key players in the highest levels of power, that reaches down into the lives of every man, woman, and child on this planet.”
“Get me on this plane.”
“You've never seen me panic. When I panic, I make this face.”
“After all you've seen you can just walk away?“
“Fine, here’s the truth. I'm the key figure in an ongoing government charade, the plot to conceal the truth about the existence of extraterrestrials. It's a global conspiracy, actually, with key players in the highest levels of power, that reaches down into the lives of every man, woman, and child on this planet.”
“Get me on this plane.”
Thursday, December 23, 2010
"Better To Leave Something To the Imagination"
You know how at some point an older dressing room attendant at Nordstrom's said this to you when you were like, "Can I pair the miniskirt with this belly shirt?" (Haha I have never once asked that.)
I think it's dumb advice, because people have crazy imaginations. Like you would never want to dress in a way that leaves anything to the imagination if you were dating James Cameron, because then he'd inevitably be disappointed you didn't have an electric blue 10-ft-long tail/flying horse syncher tucked in your baggy pants.
I DUNNOOOO, THIS IS JUST SOMETHING I WAS THINKING. DON'T SHOOT THE MESSENGER. IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO.
I think it's dumb advice, because people have crazy imaginations. Like you would never want to dress in a way that leaves anything to the imagination if you were dating James Cameron, because then he'd inevitably be disappointed you didn't have an electric blue 10-ft-long tail/flying horse syncher tucked in your baggy pants.
I DUNNOOOO, THIS IS JUST SOMETHING I WAS THINKING. DON'T SHOOT THE MESSENGER. IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO.
Friday, December 10, 2010
“If you can’t afford to hire a bartender,” he added, “you shouldn’t be having a party.”
You shouldn't even have friends. What would you and your "friends" do? Walk? OUTSIDE? Play the recorder on the 5 train platform? Lick a banana peel you found lying on top of a city garbage can and say it's okay because of the "three second rule"?
You shouldn't even have friends. What would you and your "friends" do? Walk? OUTSIDE? Play the recorder on the 5 train platform? Lick a banana peel you found lying on top of a city garbage can and say it's okay because of the "three second rule"?
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Let's Not Forget About The Burritos.
Tommy Lee’s born-viral letter to Sea World condemning them for masturbating a whale reads, in part:
“We understand that you refuse to release this frustrated whale because he is your chief sperm bank, and we know that the way you get his sperm is by having someone enter the pool and masturbate him with a cow’s vagina filled with hot water. Even during my wildest days in Motley Crue I could’ve never imagined something so sick and twisted.”
A PERFECT RATIO NOTE ON THIS: It’s like, okay, small clap, Tommy Lee, you're a bonafide animal rights hero and a hilarious Internet meme for the day of December 9th, BUT buuuuuuuuuuuuut let’s not forget you used to fuck breakfast burritos on your tour bus to get the smell of groupies off of your penis. Not quite as disgusting as hot n'wet cow pocket, I agree. But then, of course, you, as a human being, are not the same as a whale. Balancing out the differing species expectations, I might go so far as to say that sticking your junk into a breakfast burrito is maybe just as sick and twisted. I remember when I read this anecdote in The Dirt I underlined it and then wrote the best side-of-page note I've ever written, which was simply: WHY NOT SHOWER?
(A motto I now live by.)
“We understand that you refuse to release this frustrated whale because he is your chief sperm bank, and we know that the way you get his sperm is by having someone enter the pool and masturbate him with a cow’s vagina filled with hot water. Even during my wildest days in Motley Crue I could’ve never imagined something so sick and twisted.”
A PERFECT RATIO NOTE ON THIS: It’s like, okay, small clap, Tommy Lee, you're a bonafide animal rights hero and a hilarious Internet meme for the day of December 9th, BUT buuuuuuuuuuuuut let’s not forget you used to fuck breakfast burritos on your tour bus to get the smell of groupies off of your penis. Not quite as disgusting as hot n'wet cow pocket, I agree. But then, of course, you, as a human being, are not the same as a whale. Balancing out the differing species expectations, I might go so far as to say that sticking your junk into a breakfast burrito is maybe just as sick and twisted. I remember when I read this anecdote in The Dirt I underlined it and then wrote the best side-of-page note I've ever written, which was simply: WHY NOT SHOWER?
(A motto I now live by.)
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Audience Questions Are The Best
Last night I went to a screening of Blue Valentine. There was a Q and A after and every single audience "question" went something like this. Audience "questions" are the best.
Susan: Hi my name is Susan, and my question is, well, I think that scene in the motel when you're making love was really intimate... like it just speaks testimony to your skills as actors,you know? I mean when you guys were on the floor rolling around it was just great to watch, I really loved it, it felt super real, though I suppose you must have had a thousand camera men around you, right? Ha ha. But just considering how intimate it must have been and how realistic it seemed to us, you know?"
DEAD SILENCE
Susan:...So I guess I was wondering if you could talk a little bit about that?
Susan: Hi my name is Susan, and my question is, well, I think that scene in the motel when you're making love was really intimate... like it just speaks testimony to your skills as actors,you know? I mean when you guys were on the floor rolling around it was just great to watch, I really loved it, it felt super real, though I suppose you must have had a thousand camera men around you, right? Ha ha. But just considering how intimate it must have been and how realistic it seemed to us, you know?"
DEAD SILENCE
Susan:...So I guess I was wondering if you could talk a little bit about that?
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