I've just discovered the secret source of happiness behind the smiles of all these bright Diet Coke-guzzling people who I work with at my new job for a much bigger, wealthier magazine corporation: the vending machine is money-optional. That is, it will suck your dollar if you would like it to, but your green paper is not necessary to make an infinite amount of snack size Wise popcorn fall out of the machine. If you ever dreamed of a tree that dispensed limitless candy when you were a young little piglet, you are a Kinda Nasté type o' girl.