As I was walking to Whole Foods for lunch today, I found myself walking in line with a man, who was a dwarf (midget? What's the PC term?)

He looked up at me and asked, "How does it feel to be tall?"

I squirmed uncomfortably and simply smiled, not wanting to rub it in by squealing "It's great! I can see at concerts! I run fast! etc...."

Then he said, "I bet I could climb you."

"Uh....."

"Yeah I'll just grab onto your nice handles there in front."

OMG, WHAT CAN YOU SAY TO A PERVERTED MIDGET?

I called Gaby right away and she maintains I should have given him a piggyback. Now I feel strangely guilty for not letting him do the monkeybars on my boobs.