Thursday, November 15, 2007

From the Mouth of a Marmot.

Look i wrote a post for your blog!

"THINGS LAUREN DOES THAT I LOVE: a semi-regular series by Marmsies, Lauren's roommate

This new blog column is inspired by Mindy Kaling's blog "Things I've Bought that I Love", only instead of things I bought, it is about pleasant things my roommate Lauren has done.

Today's thing: Lauren's Drew Barrymore impression

I have a lot of love for Drew Barrymore. I think it might be biological, even--like, maybe if you got your period the week 'Mad Love' came out, she is like imprinted on you forever. In fact, that must be it, because she hasn't been in a movie I have enjoyed since Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle. Anyway, I really love Drew most of the time and am often really defensive when people criticize her. Like, when people talk trash on all her retarded and inarticulate political opinions, I'm like, It's not like it was her choice to only have an eighth grade education, okay? She was owned by the studio! (Ed note: and she was fed coke when she was like a toddler! Both the soda and the drug!) And also, when people made fun of her for not wearing a bra to the MTV Movie Awards a few years ago, I was like, If you're Drew Barrymore and you've been going to the MTV Movie Awards for like 15 years, I'm sure it's basically just another annoying thing you have to do on a Tuesday that you don't even care about enough to put a bra on for. I understand.

(Ed. Note: I think both the author and I would agree that her tatas look tatatacular here.)

(If I were around Drew I'd tell incessant Tom Green penis jokes, because all I want is to see her smile ALL THE TIME, she is so adorbs.)

But Lauren does this amazing impression of Drew endorsing Cover Girl products and just kind of says the Cover Girl motto out of the side of her mouth, with Drew's kind of weird, soft, delicate lisp? I feel like Drew's lisp is very pleasant and almost cashmere-like. Anyway, I love this impression, and actually, now that I think about it, I love this impression because it is not making fun, it is a loving homage. Also, Cover Girl makes a great oil-free pressed powder that will cake really badly on your acne and make you look like your babysitter from 1991 if you use it on your face, but it is great for setting lipstick.

Love, Marmsies"

1 comment:

Simone said...

Last winter I went to a screening of the 400 Blows at the French Institute by myself and Drew Barrymore (I swear it was her - swear!) was also there by herself and so we share a kinship of sorts.